Unearthing Your Values With ACT

When you're caregiving, living with chronic illness, grieving, burned out—or simply surviving for long stretches of time—it’s easy to lose track of your values. Not the ones you were told to have, but the ones that feel quietly true to you.

Values aren’t goals. They’re not something to strive for or check off a list. But they are motivators—internal signals that guide how we show up, what we move toward, and what we say yes or no to. Acting in alignment with your values, even in the smallest of ways, can shift something inside. It can move you closer to a life that feels more meaningful, more grounded, and more like your own.

Values Questions for Reflection

If you're feeling a little disconnected from yourself—or unsure what still matters—you’re not alone. These questions are meant to be held gently, not answered all at once. Let them linger. You don’t need to rush toward clarity.

  • What feels most meaningful to me right now—and what’s felt missing?

  • What do I long for—not as a goal, but as a feeling?

  • Where have I been saying yes to things that don’t reflect who I am anymore?

  • What did I used to care about that still flickers somewhere inside me?

  • If I weren’t so tired, what would I make space for?

  • Where am I craving honesty—either with myself or someone else?

Truffle Hunting for What Matters

(aka, How ACT Can Help)

In Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), there’s a metaphor therapists sometimes use to describe values work: truffle hunting. If you’re searching for truffles, you’re not in a rush. You’re not following a trail. You’re just wandering with curiosity, following the scent of what matters.

It’s not aimless wandering—it’s sacred. You’re moving toward something rare, fragrant, and deeply personal. Values work uncovers something that lives below the surface and doesn’t always show up right away.
But when it does, you know. It’s magic.

Sometimes when you go out foraging, you find something.
Sometimes you just notice the ground you’re walking on.
Either way, you’re paying attention.

This is what values work can feel like in therapy—a slow unearthing of what matters most to you. A practice of getting closer to what’s meaningful, especially when you’ve been in survival mode for so long.

In this metaphor, I’m the truffle pig—skilled at sniffing out what’s buried, even when it’s deep in the soil.
But you get to be the chef.
You decide how to use these rare and meaningful ingredients—your values—in a recipe that feels nourishing, satisfying, and even delicious.